


told you i would hold no more

by chime



Category: Kamen Rider Build
Genre: Character Study, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-10
Updated: 2019-02-10
Packaged: 2019-10-25 07:35:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17720885
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chime/pseuds/chime
Summary: A look at the relationship between Misora and Vernage, and all the things Misora carries.





	told you i would hold no more

**Author's Note:**

> *vernage voice* do you ever get tired of being nice? don't you just want to go ape shit?

Vernage sings. Not aloud. Just so Misora can hear.

Misora had heard her sing before, though that was before she knew who and what that power in her was, who it belonged to. Misora heard her voice before she fell asleep. She thought it was her mother’s, some long-lost memory come to the light. The disappointment was hard to take, so she buried the feeling alongside all the others.

Vernage sings often, in a language Misora has never heard, in a language nobody will ever hear again. Misora catches herself humming the tune sometimes. This troubles her occasionally. Mostly, the song is pretty.

Misora read a story, or a story was read to her, about Martians. About humans becoming Martians. Maybe Evolt showed it to her, as a joke. She thinks that would be a pretty good one, really.

Misora doesn’t know what Martians looked like, what they wore, what they ate. Vernage might tell her, if she asks. That’s a burden Misora doesn’t want to carry. So she doesn’t.

 

* * *

 

 

Misora talks to Vernage, though she doesn’t expect her to answer. She knows Vernage is barely holding herself on Earth, and talking to Misora would be a waste of energy. Selfishly, Misora thinks she prefers the silence.

“So inconsiderate,” Misora says, after nearly tripping over one of Banjou’s weights. “He knows it’s such a pain to move these things.”

“We moved here while I was asleep, you know,” Misora says, while the others are gone, fighting, “I didn’t have much time to decorate before Sento came, and Evolt gave him free reign. I think the basement would feel a lot nicer if the walls weren’t so bright, they make my head hurt...”

“I don’t usually cook, but I think this will make Sawa happy.” Misora says while chopping carrots, “She likes spicy things, which makes sense, doesn’t it?”

Vernage doesn’t respond, but Misora likes to think she enjoys the company.

 

* * *

 

When Vernage does speak, Misora almost doesn’t notice.

Vernage taking control is like being underwater, but without any fear, without anything at all. A weighted blanket. Comforting. Vernage’s voice, if it can be called that, is the same. Like cool water down her throat.

Misora would have trouble putting Vernage’s thoughts into exact words, but she understands them easily enough.

“I never really liked those stories. The princess in a tower,” Misora says, lying on the bed in the basement. Tossing U-tan in the air idly, trying not to think of what dangerous thing Sento’s pulling this time.

_What did you like?_

Misora pauses, arms in the air. U-tan falls on her face and she slowly moves to grab it, holds it close. “Is it okay for you to be talking?”

_Using a body is tiring, as you are well aware. This is different, is it not?_

Misora frowns. Vernage pushes at her, genuinely interested in what cartoons she watched as a kid for some reason. “I liked stuff with talking animals, mostly. Stories about working together. Things kids like.”

 _I see_. Vernage says. Misora doesn’t.

 

* * *

 

Vernage’s power scares her.

Not because of the power itself. Misora fears the dark spots in her memory, the seven years of her life, gone. And, when things are her worst, she fears Vernage herself.

Vernage is a mysterious woman, though Misora struggles to think of her that way. Instead she is an enigmatic figure, a force of nature, a cloud hanging over her. Misora does not ask her questions. The prospect of getting an answer overwhelms her.

 _I would not blame you,_ Vernage says, _if you resent me._

Misora sits at the counter of the cafe. Sometimes she can barely stay away. Now, she can’t sleep. Odd, how that works. “Why would I? You had to do what was right.”

_That doesn’t make it fair._

 

* * *

 

 _Do you resent them?_ Vernage asks.

“Shouldn’t you be conserving energy?” Misora asks in return, managing to sound somewhere between nervous and annoyed. She wants Vernage to be able to see this until the end. She deserves that much.

_And what do you deserve?_

Misora takes a breath. She stares at walls covered in Sento’s theories and equations, at the blankets in a pile in a corner. She doesn’t know why Vernage is asking, since she seems to be able to read her thoughts as she pleases. Maybe she just likes Misora’s voice. Misora says, “I don’t resent them. Of course I don’t. They’re my family.”

Vernage hums. Misora is starting to get a headache. Vernage says, _Are you aware that the two are not mutually exclusive?_

“Don’t treat me like a child.”

 _You are all children to me,_ Vernage muses, _Him most of all._

Misora isn’t sure if she believes that. She can’t see Evolt as anything but a father to her, to Sento. What an awful legacy.

_We are getting off track._

“I don’t know.” Misora says, honestly. “I don’t think about it like that. They’re doing what’s right. What kind of person would I be, to be mad about it?”

_Are you angry?_

“Does it matter?” Misora says, standing, suddenly furious. Why does she care so much? Does Vernage want her to cry? To scream? “I want them to be here. I want to make dinner with them and talk about things that have nothing to do with Riders or weapons or aliens. I want my dad! Does hearing that make you feel better? Will you leave here feeling fulfilled?”

 _I thought it would make_ you _feel better._

“Weird! I guess you don’t know everything after all!” Misora says, scrubbing at her face. She guesses Vernage got what she wanted, because she doesn’t speak again for a while. Misora feels the absence, like Vernage is hiding somewhere. She wishes this wasn’t something she had to deal with.

 

Later, when Misora can’t sleep, she asks, “What’s that song you always sing?”

There is a long moment when she thinks Vernage will not respond. Then, _A lullaby. Would you like to hear it?_

Misora traces her finger along the table. A rabbit, a cat, a snake. “Do you know any others?”

Misora can’t see, but she thinks Vernage is smiling.


End file.
